The Weight of Motherhood in a Scary World (E82)

Why Motherhood Feels Heavier Right Now (And It’s Not Just You)

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[00:00:00] You're trying to keep it together. You're packing lunches, wiping counters, reading bedtime stories, and also scrolling through devastating headlines at 9:00 PM while wondering what kind of world your kids are growing up in.

You feel like you should be doing more, feeling more, fixing more, and yet you're also supposed to be the steady one, the cheerful one, the fun mom. If you've been carrying all of that and wondering why does motherhood feel so heavy right now, I want you to know it's not just you.

In this episode, we're going to unpack that weight and talk about what to do when it all feels like too much. My name is Krissy Bold. I am a stay at home mom to two little boys, and this is Mom's Guide to Finding Herself.

I wanna take you back to a Tuesday morning. Not too long ago, I was standing at my kitchen island, scrolling headlines with one hand and pouring milk with the other. My youngest was asking, well, really, honestly, demanding the blue plate and not the green one. And my oldest was repeating the names of the countries on his globe at lightning [00:01:00] speed.

And I was nodding like I was listening. But really I was reading about something awful, something that happened to someone else's child on the other side of the world, something I couldn't stop thinking about. And in that moment I felt this wave of guilt. Guilt that I was distracted, guilt that I wasn't doing anything about it.

Guilt that I was doing everything right here in my kitchen while people elsewhere were in chaos. And right as the tears were starting to well in my eyes, my son walked in and said, mama, can you put my socks on?

I blinked, I wiped my face with the back of my sleeve and I put on his socks like everything was normal, like I hadn't just been hit in the chest by the weight of the world. And then like we all do, I shook it off. I put on my everything's fine voice and moved on to snack prep and getting everyone out the door.

But the weight didn't go away because it wasn't just that [00:02:00] moment. It was the hundred that came after it. Putting on my happy mom voice while my brain replayed the news on a loop, trying to stay present while wondering what I was even supposed to do with all of this fear, this grief.

This rage. I don't want to ignore what was happening, but I also didn't want to crush my kids with the heaviness of a world that they're not ready to carry. And that's the impossible tightrope that so many of us are walking right now. Okay, we're parenting in an era of nonstop crisis. There is no off button for the news.

It's in our feeds, our group texts, our podcasts, our kitchen counters. We carry a near constant awareness of suffering and systemic injustice, and there's a name for this. It's the emotional labor of global awareness. Motherhood has always been emotionally demanding, but today we're [00:03:00] mothering and the age of constant input.

The 24 7 news cycle isn't something that we occasionally catch on the evening news. It lives in our pockets. We see suffering between photos of our friends' kids, and reels about toddler snack hacks.

And that awareness is compounded by motherhood because even when the headlines aren't about kids. We interpret it all as moms a story about a climate disaster. We think, well, what will the world look like when my kids are grown? If we hear news about school shootings or racial injustice wars or food prices rising, we absorb all of it and it amplifies this constant undercurrent of worry.

Am I doing enough? Should I be speaking up, showing up, changing the world? While also shaping theirs. It's the invisible emotional labor of being awake to the world while still trying to create a childhood full of magic and safety and stability.

It [00:04:00] is no wonder why you're exhausted.

Here's the paradox that we live in. We are supposed to raise well adjusted, kind, joyful kids in a world that doesn't feel well adjusted or kind or joyful, most of the time you might be reading about a humanitarian crisis while singing the wheels on the bus.

You might be overwhelmed by politics, but also Googling birthday party ideas with jungle animal themes. The dissonance, the whiplash of reality and routine is real. It's not that we're pretending nothing's wrong,

it's that we're trying to protect their childhood while also reckoning with the weight of the world. And it is a lot. You are pulled in two different directions. Be informed. Do something. Speak up. Or protect your peace. Be present. Don't let the fear steal the joy.

You're trying to be that soft place for your kids to land [00:05:00] while your own nervous system is screaming. You're doing it without a playbook because our mothers didn't raise us with daily breaking news updates. We are the first generation of moms trying to mother through the chaos of 24 7 information, and that matters.

So what can we actually do without breaking ourselves? There is no easy fix for the state of the world, but we can shift how we carry the weight. Here are some things that help. First, give yourself permission to name how you're feeling. Write it down, say it out loud. Tell a friend.

I'm feeling overwhelmed by the state of things. I feel like I'm supposed to care, and act and fix, and also smile through bedtime routines. Naming it takes it out of your chest and gives it somewhere to land. Create boundaries around news intake. Designate a time of day to check the news.

Maybe it's mid-morning when you're more [00:06:00] grounded. Avoid doom scrolling at night or while you're with your kids. Curate your feeds to include hopeful, joyful, and funny content too. You need to feel more than despair. Anchor yourself in small regulating moments.

When the world feels out of control, focus on what's right in front of you, the things that remind you that you're alive and connected, and okay. In this moment, take five deep belly breaths, step outside barefoot, and look at the sky. Play your favorite Feel good songs while you make dinner.

Hug your kids and let them feel your heartbeat. None of this fixes the world, but it helps you stay steady enough to keep going. And then you can take action, even if it's tiny. You don't have to carry the weight of the world, but you can use your voice in ways that don't drain you. Here are a few low lift, but high impact [00:07:00] ways to engage.

Use the Five calls app to quickly call your lawmakers about issues you care about. It gives you a script, the phone number, and it takes less than two minutes. Send an email to your state reps or fill out the contact form on their websites about something that matters to you.

Gun laws, maternal health education, use chat GPT or AI to draft it for you. You don't need to be eloquent. You just need to show up. Talk to your kids in small age, appropriate ways about kindness and justice and compassion. You are planting seeds even when the world feels messy.

Donate $5 to a cause that aligns with your values or share a post or amplify a voice. You don't have to do everything to make a difference. Let your activism be sustainable, not self-sacrificing. And remember, you are not the whole world. You are one [00:08:00] person

and your children seeing you care and act and rest is a powerful legacy. It's okay to lay the weight down. It's okay to just play candy land and make grilled cheese and be a soft landing for your babies. You are doing so much more than you realize. If this episode gave you a little bit of breathing room or helped you feel seen, take a moment to share it with a mom friend who might need it to follow, subscribe, or leave a review. Your words help this show Reach more moms who are carrying more than they can name.

In the next episode, we're going to hear the story of a mom who thought she'd done everything right because in the area that she was an expert she had, but when motherhood hit, even that part didn't go as planned. We're going to hear from a certified dog trainer who had the prep, the experience and the plan, and still found herself completely blindsided.

If you've ever thought I've got this part handled only to watch it all fall apart, her [00:09:00] story is going to hit home. Until then, take a moment for yourself and remember, you are an amazing mom just as you are.